TED | 如何真诚表达赞美钦佩和谢意

 

演讲简介
在这段谈话中，Laura Trice 博士思索了“谢谢你”这句话具有的神奇力量—加深友谊，维持互相之间的联系，确保他人知道他对你的意义。

 

 

 

演讲精彩片段（节选）欣赏

 

And praise really does have to be genuine, but she takes responsibility for that. And a friend of mine, April, who I've had since kindergarten, she thanks her children for doing their chores. And she said, "Why wouldn't I thank it, even though they're supposed to do it?"

赞扬别人一定要真诚，但她对赞美承担了责任。一个从我上幼儿园就一直是朋友的叫April的人，她会感谢她的孩子们做了家务。她说：“为什么我不表示感谢呢，即使他们本来就要做那些事情？”

 

And it's because I'm giving you critical data about me. I'm telling you where I'm insecure. I'm telling you where I need your help. And I'm treating you, my inner circle, like you're the enemy. Because what can you do with that data? You could neglect me. You could abuse it. Or you could actually meet my need.

因为这会使我把我的重要信息与你分享。会让我告诉了你我内心的不安。会让你认为我需要你的帮助。虽然你是我最贴心的人，我却把你当作是敌人。你会用我托付给你的重要信息做些什么呢？你可以忽视我。你可以滥用它。或者你可以满足我的要求。

 

So, I'm going to challenge all of you. I want you to true your wheels: be honest about the praise that you need to hear. What do you need to hear? Go home to your wife -- go ask her, what does she need? Go home to your husband -- what does he need? Go home and ask those questions, and then help the people around you.

所以我要问在场的所有人，我希望你们把你们的车轮整形一下： 真诚面对对你们想听到的赞美。你们想听到什么呢？ 回家问问你们的妻子，她想听到什么？ 回家问问你们的丈夫，他想听到什么？回家问问这些问题，并帮助身边的人实现它们。

And it's simple. And why should we care about this? We talk about world peace. How can we have world peace with different cultures, different languages? I think it starts household by household, under the same roof. So, let's make it right in our own backyard. 

非常简单。为什么要关心这个呢？ 我们谈论世界和平。我们怎么用不同的文化，不同的语言来保持世界和平？ 我想要从每个小家庭并且在同一屋檐下开始。所以让我们在家里就把这件事情做好。 

 

And I want to thank all of you in the audience for being great husbands, great mothers, friends, daughters, sons. And maybe somebody's never said that to you, but you've done a really, really good job. And thank you for being here, just showing up and changing the world with your ideas.

我想要感谢所有在这里的人们 因为你们是好丈夫，好母亲，好伙伴，好女儿和好儿子。或许有些人从没跟你们说过，但你们已经做得非常非常得出色了。感谢你们来到这里，向世界显示着你们的智慧，并用它们改变着世界。